33 more boring things you never wanted to know :>)

1. What time is it? sometime in the afternoon

2. What are your full names? Wislon of Wisdom!

3. What are you most afraid of: the horrible things in life, who isn't

4. Place of birth? average town England otherwise known as Swindon

5. Favourite food? Veggie Biriyani

6. Your natural hair colour? brown, always has been, yet to dye it pink or blond
7. Have you travelled? only a bit, Poland here we come .....again

8. Do you scrunch or fold (toilet paper)? does it matter..I make origami with it

9. Love someone so much it made you cry? Yes
10. Been in a car accident? prangs

11. BMW or Mercedes Benz - both?

12. Favourite day of the week? Friday hometime

13. Favourite Restaurant? the Indus an Indian place

14. Favourite Flower? red rose

15. Favourite sport to watch? gymnastics, not into watching sports, have done ths qu's before

16. Favourite Drink? Baileys

17. Favourite ice cream? cocconut from a posho Italian place off Caranaby St London

18. Disney or Warner Brothers? both

19. Favourite fast food restaurant? Pizza Hut, does that count for the buffet?

20. What colour is your bedroom carpet? reddish

21. How many times you failed your driver's test? nil

22. Before this one, from whom did you get your last e-mail? can't remember
23. What do you do most often when you are bored? watch a film/ telly prog

24. Bedtime? already?

25. What means the most to you? being ok and happy and my close ones too

26. Favourite TV shows? The Shield, The Sweeney

27. Dating MALES or FEMALES- what's that? ;>) haven't done that for a while

28. Left or Right? don't mind

29. What is your favourite colour? red

30. How many pets do you have? None yet
31. Which came first the chicken or the egg? the chicken
32. What would you most like to achieve before you die? Sell a painting!:>)

33. What is your star Sign: Pisces can't you tell

Testimonials

Have you ever spoken and wished that you could immediately take the words back...or that you could crawl into a hole?

Here are the Testimonials of a few people who did....
FIRST TESTIMONY: I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three kids in tow and asked loudly,"How much do you charge for a shampoo and a blow job?" I turned around and walked back out and never went back. My husband didn't say a word..he knew better.

SECOND TESTIMONY: I was at the golf store comparing different kinds of golf balls.I was unhappy with the women's type I had been using. After browsing for several minutes, I was approached by one of the good-looking gentlemen who works at the store. He asked if he could help me. Without thinking, I looked at him and said, "I think I like playing with men's balls".

THIRD TESTIMONY: My sister and I were at the mall and passed by a store that sold a variety of candy and nuts. As we were looking at the display case, the boy behind the counter asked if we needed any help. I replied, "No, I'm just looking at your nuts." My sister started to laugh hysterically. The boy grinned, and I turned beet-red and walked away. To this day,my sister has never let me forget.

FOURTH TESTIMONY: While in line at the bank one afternoon, my toddler decided to release some pent-up energy and ran amok. I was finally able to grab hold of her after receiving looks of disgust and annoyance from other patrons. I told her that if she did not start behaving "right now" she would be punished. To my horror, she looked me in the eye and said in a voice just as threatening,"If you don't let me go right now,I will tell Grandma that I saw you kissing Daddy's pee-pee last night!" The silence was deafening after this enlightening exchange. Even the tellers stopped what they were doing. I mustered up the last of my dignity and walked out of the bank with my daughter in tow. The last thing I heard when the door closed behind me, were >screams of laughter.

FIFTH TESTIMONY: Have you ever ! asked your child a question too many times? My three-year-old son had a lot of problems with
potty training and I was on him constantly. One day we stopped at Taco Bell for a quick lunch, in between errands. It was very busy, with a full dining room. While enjoying my taco,I smelled something funny, so of course I checked my seven-month-old daughter, she was clean. Then I realized that Danny had not asked to go potty in a while. I asked him if he needed to go, and he said "No. "I kept thinking "Oh Lord, that child has had an accident, and I don't have any clothes with me. Then I said, "Danny, are you SURE you
didn't have an accident?" "No," he replied. I just KNEW that he must have had an accident, because the smell was getting worse. .Soooooo, I asked one more time, "Danny did you have an accident? "This time he jumped up, yanked down his pants, bent over, spread his cheeks and yelled "SEE MOM, IT'S JUST FARTS!!" While 30 people nearly choked to death on their tacos laughing, he
calmly pulled up his pants and sat down. An old couple made me feel better,thanking me for the best laugh they'd ever had!

LAST BUT NOT LEAST SIXTH TESTIMONY: This had most of the state of Michigan laughing for 2 days and a very embarrassed female news anchor who will, in the future, likely think before she speaks. What happens when you predict snow but don't get any? We
had a female news anchor that, the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn't, turned to the weatherman and asked:"So Bob, where's that 8 inches you promised me last night?" Not only did HE have to leave the set,but half the crew did too they were laughing so hard!

Planet Zog

Still here, just not in a constructive mode for typing babble at the moment.

Oh I think I just did:>)

Whatever tickles your fandanglies

Sorry it's been a while, just been busy doing stuff... managed to see the new Pirates film, not so impressed with it as the 1st and 2nd..just too much going on but enjoyed the action as ever, I think the later showing meaning my ticket to snoozeville didn't help. Also saw 28 days, was very impressed with that and will stick in my mind, waiting to see 28 weeks later, but can a sequel be as good?

Didn't go to cheese rolling but got a blasting from street bands drumming nad playing Status Quo covers outside our flat, must be getting old as I tried blasting the noise out with higherl volumes of Bowie whilst painting a picture of flowers in a vase, yes I must be old and a fuddy duddy to boot already:>).......whatever atleast it was enjoyable.

Oh and i've discovered I do enjoy computer games afterall.. lego Star Wars is just great!

enough of this whoozing on and on, bored now.

Little boxes

Little boxes, little boxes, heavy little boxes.....

Just moved and managed to sneak a bit of blog time in, we're absolutely shattered. I suppose lugging stuff up to a top floor might have something to do with it. Aching leggies aside it's great to be in a new place with my other half.

Catch you all soon :>)

Funny requests

After spending a smashing evening watching our friend perform in the Canterbury Tales we managed to attract an interesting individual.
My other half was oblivious to the feminine qualities that excuded from this individual who fancied chatting about theatrics with us. The painted nails and long hair hinted to goth status but he obviously felt comfortable enough with us to then tell us of his sex change ops..the next question I wasn't expecting... he asked what size were my feet and could he try on my heels...
My feet are size 8 and his were 6, our friends wanted to leave so somehow I managed to avoid lending my shoe wear to this intriguing person who our friends find annoying, but it's not every day someone likes my shoe wear enough to try it on. I obviously have similar tastes to drag....and no they weren't sparkly either.

Funny situation

Top 5 -18 rated film scenes

According to the BBC here are the top 5:-

1 Dinner chestburster - Alien - tame, happens all the time!
2 Glass decapitation - The Omen- watch out for falling spikey things when taking a walk through a churchyard, creepy people
3 Wolf transformation - An American Werewolf in London- hairy guy in London, show me something I don't know
4 Crucifix abuse - The Exorcist - lots of green yucky stuff from mouth and nasal areas , dodgy dreary wall paper and a grizzly girl - didn't the Priest realise she had pre pmt .
5 Ready Ralph? - Risky Business - lots of naughty but nice bits and dodgy white socks that you can slip n slide down hallways in!


I'll never forget the train scene in Risky Business!! ooeer missus, the only one I haven't seen properly is An American Werewolf in London.

What about the violence in La Confidential, Hellraiser, Seven, The Godfather any Al Pacino film apart from Frankie and Johnny.

What's your top 5?

5 things from stellarlassy

1. Where is your favorite getaway spot in the UK? Oxford by the river,ducks and culfy
>2. What do you like most about your job? Least? Don't ask- going through a weird time of it there
>3. Describe your personal style. Do you dress for comfort? Do you wear 'sensible shoes' or naughty stilettos? i'm a comfy wearer...boring eh but keep stilettos for nights out
>4. What did you like best about the street/neighborhood where you grew up? otehr kids to play with- nothing bad
>5. Who was your favorite teacher in school? What made him/her so special?
Art- he was wacky- but put me off teaching, now I blame him when maybe I should be doing it ;) ah well only myself to really blame.
>

Chocs away those kisses

The latest snippets i've heard:

Chocolate is better for you and the feel good hormones it releases last longer than kissing your partner!
So get out your king size dairy milk bars out and chomp away. What nicer way to spend your time in order to feel good and a kiss along the way won't be a hindrance too much either!...as if.

Honestly the advice we hear today, what will tomorrow's be..

Answers on a bar of chocolate please:>)

Pay kids to learn!

Yes you read that correctly!! Deary me now in order for more pupils to take up Science and Technology subjects at school a new idea is to pay them to do so. So am I wrong or is this weird and have school ideals gone out the window? I assume it's the government who are worried that less and less people are attracted towards Science subjects and take up Science based careers. whatever happened to liking a subject for waht it is or attracting childern to Science through silly fun experiments, mess and explosions. I can still smell the bunsen burner gas now. Children now are known as consumers of Education it seems not as learners. Also naughty pupils will soon be given ipods for improved behaviour.

I don't undertand the ethics of schools, do you?

answers on a slate please.

inspirational highs and lows

After having a much needed rest since Closer I now would iike to stir my creative juices and start painting and drawing again..thinking possibly poetry could get my mind in motion..there's a song there.
Yesterday Cavy and I spent a few relaxing hours with some like minded folk, two guys with novel interests. Having the time to talk about literature, films and culture seemed like we'd stepped back in time. I even asked them if they ever wished they were born in a different era, I know i've felt like that at times. Student life didn't feel quite so far away in the past but their talks of dabblings in drugs and adventures on an opium high in India were experiences which have passed me by.

Nothing else for it but to get out my incence sticks.

Classic Film One liners

I like these:-

Top five classic one liners

1) "Infamy! Infamy! They've all got it in for me!" - Kenneth Williams (Julius Caesar) Carry On Cleo (1964)

2) "He's not the messiah, he's a very naughty boy." - Terry Jones (Brian's Mum) Life Of Brian (1979)

3) Robert Hays (Ted Striker): "Surely you can't be serious." Leslie Nielsen (Rumack): "I am serious... and don't call me Shirley." - Airplane (1980)

4) "Remember you're fighting for this woman's honour, which is probably more than she ever did." - Groucho Marx (Rufus T Firefly) Duck Soup (1933)

5) "Don't knock masturbation, it's sex with someone I love." - Woody Allen, (Alvy Singer) Annie Hall (1977)

Middling moaning England

Late last night I watched on TV a guy who was trying to find out what is Middle England and where is it. I was intrigued as to why this guy was so interested to pursue this term of phrase.
He managed to slip in the fact that he'd gained a B in GCSE Geography which gave him the boost to cut out from a map of the UK all the places he didn't think were Middle England ie: all cities, Wales, Scotland, Cornwall and Devon for the hell of it. He spoke to a Social Professor and was taken around suburbs of somewhere and shown the twitching net curtains of suburbia. He pottered along to a book group in Norfolk because that's what he guessed at Middle Englanders do. They weren't happy with the label and certainly didn't want to be seen as intellects. Then he pottered on to a golf course where one guy interviewed said he was proud to be Tory besides the fact he likes blue and that golf clubs do stop all from entering. He then went on about too many people are entering our country. Sorry but at this point I hufffed at the telly. Then the pinnacle of this guy's intrepid journey into Middle England took him to Jilly Cooper's home (writer of Riders and lots of other romantic fiction involving things heaving in haystacks). In her suming up of Middle Englanders she felt they are afraid of change, like things just so and shop for art at Harrods.

Is that because they like the posh looking Harrods bags the paintings come in and they can pick it up alongwith a designer handbag and suit or they can't face the hassel of going around art galleries with all those pretentious looking people. My mind slightly boggles as I feel i'm anti snob here but I go to these places like Harrods, Waitrose and M&S maybe the lack of a range rover and golf membership keeps me out of the Middle England set, which I'm happy about but wouldn't mind more money to spend in those places i've mentioned, so am I seeking a middle England existence??? yikes on a 4 wheel trike

So all in all the guy's quest was bit vague like this post :>)

I think I know where Middle England is, it's the wine asle of Waitrose, Cirencester... see you there. Wouldn't it be more fun to find Middle Earth and Hobbiton?

Free range chicks

I went to a craft evening at the Elim church with a friend last night so I was straight into something else after the play. We arrived tipsey so we weren't taking it seriously:>) We had to watch a lady from London who's been on telly making cards and things so the subject was right up my street, we then made one of the cards! It was for women only- i'd say the cake n coffee was good, the cards were fun to make and some of my pals mates were fine- older ladies she knows through the church but one woman who she didn't know slapped my pal on the leg when she wasn't concentrating enough- talk about treating someone like a kidddie, so we were a bit put off by that woman who was a bit over familiar... all in all an odd but fun time, think I prefer mixed socials, all women together seemed a bit like a covern... there were some church books for sale and rings n things, wasn't in your face religion but it was mentioned. God told the demonstrator to go for it and make cards...whatever helps someone do something they enjoy must be fine....

We were also encouraged to check out free range chicks on the net.

Austen 'too ugly' for book cover

Thanks for your kind comments, the play went extremeley well and all the hard work was well worth it. We were shattered yesterday :>)

Is it really necessary to enhance a painting in order to seem to appeal todays hyper sensitive image hungry audiences? Wordsworth publishers certainly seem narrow minded but perhaps I haven't got my Marketing head on - they thought Austen was 'too ugly' for a book cover

The book cover shows Austen without her night-cap
Novelist Jane Austen has been given a makeover for the cover of a book about her life after publishers decided an original image of her was unattractive.
"She was not much of a looker," said Helen Trayler, managing director of publisher Wordsworth Editions.

Publishers traditionally use a portrait of Austen painted by her sister but Wordsworth have added make-up, hair extensions and removed her night-cap.

The book is a new edition of a memoir by Austen's nephew.

Hair extension, make-up, tucks n lippos..whatever next :>)

Last night tonight

So far we had 31 people on first night, Thursday 80 something and last night 98- this may not seem like wowser numbers but we can only seat 200 I think.

We've just received a really good write-up from our local newspaper The Echo so that may bring in some more for tonight, haven't yet read the article but cavy Director said the write-up said - 'it was grim but absorbing', something about the simple set fixed the attention of the audience on the actors, that's what we aimed for so all good!

This week i've learnt to do scars, wounds and 5 o'clock shadow as well as help keep things running smoothly as possible backstage without getting trapped by the bed in the scene dock too many times. Let's just say things can move quickly and you have to be a bit nimble at times with heavy furniture, so far my back's been okay- bet I feel it next week when we've stopped and nowt to do :>) This play has filled my head this week, even wake up thinking about it or the things I need to do for it. So I think Sunday night- need to chill:>) think we're going to miss the buzz as it's been the most challenigng play i've helped with and the most effort I've put in to a play over the last year, well when your partner's involved heavily you do what you can.

First Night

All went well! phew

It was lovely to have friends and family support us. Two people walked out at the interval- I believe they were Americans who thanked someone for a lovely evening and promptly left, perhaps they thought Closer was a rip roaring comedy as stated incorrectly in a flyer.. don't know what they would've thought if they'd stayed longer.

The cavy as in Mr Director was chuffed, he wanted a reaction and he got one!!

Ranter - out of character

The dress rehearsal went okay, thanks for your comments of support. It'll be alright on the night but i'm afraid to admit I threw a hissy fit at one of the actors. He caught me at a bad moment whilst I was trying to find the props girlie who was haiving a sneaky fag out back when she should've been on stage he claimed there was a fag end in the beer bottle which he was about to take on stage. A truly embarrassing props moment but the way he squeeled about it he unfortuanatley got my roth. We sorted out the petty situations and we're all friends again..bless

remind me why I do these things for the theatre for FREE!!!:>)


here's a few randoms:-

one day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his Sweat- shirt. Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me, "What setting do I use on the washing machine?"
"It depends," I replied. "What does it say on your shirt?"
He yelled back, " University of Oklahoma ."
And they say blondes are dumb...
-----------------------------------------------------------
A couple is lying in bed. The man says,
"I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world."
The woman replies, "I'll miss you..."
-----------------------------------------------------------
"It's just too hot to wear clothes today," Jack says as he stepped out of the shower, "honey, what do you think the neighbors would think if I mowed the lawn like this?"
"Probably that I married you for your money," she replied.
-----------------------------------------------------------
Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?
A: A rumor
-----------------------------------------------------------
A man and his wife, now in their 60's, were celebrating their 40th wedding anniversary. On their special day a good fairy came to them and said that because they had been so good that each one of them could have one wish.
The wife wished for a trip around the world with her husband.
Whoosh! Immediately she had airline/cruise tickets in her hands.
The man wished for a female companion 30 years younger...
Whoosh...immediately he turned ninety!!!
Gotta love that fairy!
-----------------------------------------------------------
Dear Lord,
I pray for Wisdom to understand my man; Love to forgive him; And Patience for his moods. Because, Lord, if I pray for Strength, I'll beat him to death.
AMEN
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- -
Q: Why do little boys whine?
A: They are practicing to be men.
-----------------------------------------------------------
Q: What do you call a handcuffed man?
A: Trustworthy.
-----------------------------------------------------------
Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?
A: You did not hold the pillow down long enough.
-----------------------------------------------------------
Q: Why do men whistle when they are sitting on the toilet?
A: It helps them remember which end they need to wipe.
-----------------------------------------------------------
Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?
A: Rename the mail folder "Instruction Manuals"
-----------------------------------------------------------

showstoppers

The Technical went without any major hitches last night so now on to the Dress Rehearsal tonight and First night tomorrow. It's a play I feel I really know now, well I should do, we've been harbouring, nurturing and living with it since last November when rehearsals started. The cast are great and probably the most exceptionally talented bunch i've worked with so far, this is an out take from all of the seriousness of the play taken last Monday. Cavy has let them bring the play to life with his directorial nouse and strong belief in his cast and crew.
So on with the fake wine, beer, saucy garters and pink wig.....
Wake me up when it's all over, sleepy wislon.

Nah only kidding wouldn't want to miss it for all the pringles in the world:>)

Closer is getting Closer

Well it's the technical tonight, could be in for a long night tonight. First night on Wednesday.
Things seem to be coming together okay so far, fingers crossed. I'll be doing a bit of this and a bit of that backstage- props, make-up and whatever else crops up.
Hope you like the poster, took the photos and was aiming for a rough/ realism look as it's not exactly a sweet play as you may know.

Tis Thursday and time for a ....!

You think men would learn Never Argue with a Woman...

One morning the husband returns after several hours of fishing and decides to take a nap. Although not familiar with the lake, the wife decides to take the boat out. She motors out a short distance, anchors, and reads her book.
Along comes a Game Warden in his boat. He pulls up alongside the woman and says, "Good morning, Ma'am. What are you doing?" "Reading a book," she replies, (thinking, Isn't that obvious?)
"You're in a Restricted Fishing Area," he informs her.
"I'm sorry, officer, but I'm not fishing. I'm reading."
"Yes, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment.
"I'll have to take you in and write you up."
"If you do that, I'll have to charge you with sexual assault," says the woman.
"But I haven't even touched you," says the game warden.
"That's true, but you have all the equipment.
For all I know you could start at any moment."
"Have a nice day ma'am," and he left.

MORAL: Never argue with a woman who reads. It's likely she can also think.

Well I don't do enough reading but I like boats and i'm a pisces so this scenaro is likely :>) Hope you're all wiggling your way from A to B!

High Heels, sore toes -The ministery of wonderful wiggly walks

Today it's been noted that the Brits can't walk and strutt properly. We don't know how to wiggle it just a little bit. On two morning TV shows the main dilema of the day was that Brits need to follow the Italians for style and grace!

We need to strutt our stuff more and not scuffle along, heads down and with a want to fade into the pavement.

So as usual celebrities were paraded out on screen as examples to follow:-

Women- J Lo, Byonce and Marilyn Monroe (swish your hips, bums n balance on heels)

Men -Daniel Craig (coz he knows how to swagger and just generally looks fabtabulous darling, sweetie!) they obviously couldn't be bothered to source more men.

So we need high heels to establish the look and walk- whether this goes for men as well i'm not too sure!

In America research has been carried out to see what attracts peope to others. Animations of moving bodies were played out in front of people and they then chose which body they were attracted to. All I gathered at this point was that men go for the wiggling botty factor, didn't catch what women go for but must've been to do with a man's stance and walk.

So get your heels on, wiggle and don't fall over in the process! I only wear em for Special occassions.

more girlie talk

Over lunch watching Loose Women I learnt all about men and what they should be doing for women- they should be looking for 'the man on the boat' whan it comes to pleasing a woman- never heard that one before, i've lead such a sheltered life.

acting up

What really riles me....one man's literall cave man views! no surprise there

It's apparent that one of the guys has become prissy of late. He can't understand why one of the characters isn't in full stripper gear prior to dress rehearsal when he's been reluctant to wear an overcoat of his own! His argument is that he can't quite imagine the scene in it's fullness! Bollocks! it's just an excuse to gawp.

In my experience at the theatre people should be acting and feeling the character they portray through their fired up imaginations and skill. If he's a good an actor as I believe and he believes himself to be then they should be able to cut the mustre do the scene, wear bin bags and spin plates at the same time...gggrrrrrr moan over....

Feel like i'm turning into a woman's lib type but I'm just sticking up for women who feel uncomfortable with another person's requests.

Sorted

With the Closer play's first night looming ever closer a few things needed to be done this weekend;-

Finish off felt man for museum scene- nearly done- whilst painting his face and giving him Elvis hair he's turning into the Cavy! Now considering actually trying to make real clothes for me, but a sewing machine is in need and I think this is an ambitious thought. Whilst enjoying making felt clothes for a small maquette I think real adult sized clothes will be a mamouth challenge for me. With dolls it doesn't matter if things don't fit quite right - thye can't complain and the odd stitch is askew but with real clothes accuracy is essential.

Help locate stripper gear- done! good ole Ann Summers comes up trumps every time- the things I do for a show!

Unintended mould mission for Sunday morning- why does mildew form in all those hard to reach places???

Photo shoot quite possibly tonight, even if the professionals don't show i'll be there snapping away.

Hope the actors turn up on time and don't start acting up all namby pamby!! This time it's the men who are getting prissy!

Barred

'Some murderers are serving too long in jail, meaning prisons will become "full of geriatric lifers", Lord Chief Justice Lord Phillips has said.

My suggestion for growing numbers in prison is build more prisons- isn't that logical?- Phillips has declared there are too many geriatric lifers doing time and taking up valuable space- so his solution is to cut down on the number of years for life sentences!!! I can't believe my ears- this gives those with murderous intents the green light to commit crimes ever more so as they can be lead to believe that they won't have to do time for as long. The crims don't seem to be dettered as it is and know that life doesn't necessarily mean life anymore.

Talking with my dad on this recently he said back in the 50's/ 60's and 70's people tended to respect Police more and know if they were going down for a murderous crime, they were going down for a long time.

a stitch in time

saves buying a doll already in Victorian gear!!!

Never knew sewing on sleeves to a coat for a doll would take so long. I've discovered how amazing felt is- yes the random stitches don't show. I'm very chuffed with my felt man. He's going to be a bit small on stage so the audience shouldn't notice any minor stitch errors- unless the blue rinse brigade are up front with their magnifying glasses. We need bums on seats but I don't think we'll attract the over a certain age punters to see Closer...which is a shame.

Pretty remarkable at 101

from the BBC:-Thomas Hardy actor in play at 101

Norrie Woodhall was cast by Thomas Hardy himself, in 1928
A woman who is thought to be the last remaining member of a theatrical group run by writer Thomas Hardy is to take to the stage again at the age of 101. Norrie Woodhall is one of the last people alive who knew the author.
She was a member of the Hardy Players, which disbanded after the poet's death in 1928, at 87, but reformed in 2005.
Ms Woodhall was cast by Mr Hardy himself, in 1928, as Tess' sister, Liza Lu in the stage version of his novel, Tess of the D'Urbervilles.
Ms Woodhall will take to the stage again to read Mr Hardy's poetry in a show called Dorset Voices.
Her performance comes 83 years after she performed in Tess of the d'Urbervilles at the Corn Exchange in Dorchester.
Ms Woodhall said Mr Hardy wrote some extra lines for her.

The original players were disbanded after Hardy's death
She said: "All I had to do was to rush across the stage, throw myself in my sister's arms and say: 'Oh, Tess, Tess', and that was all. "So he asked me for my script and he wrote into it: I am so glad you've come home, and then he looked up at me and he said: 'That's better isn't it'."

Norrie is expected to appear alongside members of the New Hardy Players in the programme, which features an afternoon of words and music from Wessex.

Good on Norrie

Customer Service announcement-rant

Encouraged to shop in Lush since receiving a wonderful service and various free goodies from a friend in the Oxford's branch, I seeked out Nhams version.

I like to potter and browse in a shop especially in this kind of shop where the colours of the soaps are
'lush' and I like to have a good gander at products first and read labels to see what they promise to do; but I was pounced on by a guy who was wanting to hard sell. I politely said I wanted to browse as I could sense as soon as I was to say I was looking for Birthday gifts he'd be onto me about every possible bath bomb variable and gift pack going.

So anyway I left the shop and went into the Body Shop opposite- the rival!!! didn't see anything I liked so I braved it back into Lush hoping not to meet that guy again but no- the same guy saw me and remarked that I'd decided to come back and he offered help so I took him up on his offer this time not wanting to offend. He quickly aimed for a gold bomb which would stain any bath tub and person so I told him I was looking to buy for friends. He began carefully putting one bath bomb in a tiny bag and then the second in another- I appreciated the help; then he saw new people come into the shop and he instantly moved off to greet his new potential customers. Well so much for customer care and seeing through the job, fortunately I didn't lose my nerve and start dropping bath bombs about the place and make a mess which was highly likely with me.

I feel this rant is petty but when I worked in shops in the past you stuck by your customer til the bitter end of their needs...

and the Razzers go to.....

Well I didn't burn any calories rather I gained many and enjoyed them all!! I'd say we mostly ate and drank our way around Oxford with our two friends who were both up for chilling out and enjoying the dreamy spires. The book shops were Dan and Cavy's haven whilst Jonsey and I hit Next. We managed to spend hours in one shop, well it was discounted stuff we couldn't ignore, the only odd thing was that you couldn't try the clothes on in the store so you either had to strip down and hope no one watches or buy the stuff and try it all in another Next. We did the latter and got some refunds, why does shopping have to a complete faff sometimes :>)


and this made me chuckle, bring on the razzers! trust a Wilson to have been the founder of these wonderful useless awards!

Worst film:-
Basic Instinct 2 has swept the Golden Raspberry Awards - the annual ceremony which mocks the worst of Hollywood ahead of the Oscars presentation.
The film picked up four awards - or Razzies - for worst movie, worst actress for Sharon Stone, worst screenplay and also worst sequel.
Little Man, a comedy by the Wayans brothers, collected three Razzies, including the worst remake or rip-off.
M. Night Shyamalan was named worst director and worst supporting actor.
'No reason to exist'

Basic Instinct 2 is the sequel to the sex-thriller that made Sharon Stone a star in 1992.

The Razzie trophy is worth less than $5, organisers say
Razzies founder John Wilson said that although the actress still looked good in her late 40s, the film "had no reason to exist".
"I mean, 14 years later - you haven't got Michael Douglas - why are you making this?" Mr Wilson told the BBC's Five Live Breakfast. "And the box office proves there was no interest in it... When a $70m picture can't make $6m, that's pretty lame," he said. The Wayans brothers - Shawn and Marlon - were named worst screen couple and also shared the prize for worst actor. Their Little Man film - a comedy about a tiny thief who disguises himself as a baby - was also awarded the Razzie for worst remake or rip-off.

Film-maker Shyamalan was named worst director and worst supporting actor for his film Lady in the Water.
The Razzie for worst supporting actress went to Carmen Electra for Date Movie and Scary Movie 4.
RV - a comedy starring Robin Williams - was chosen as worst excuse for family entertainment, in what was the newest Razzie category this year.

Mr Wilson created the Razzies in 1980. The dubious-distinction honours are decided in a vote by members of the Golden Raspberry Foundation.

Winners receive gold spray-painted trophies in the shape of a raspberry, which organisers say are worth less than $5.

and stretch and burn a hole in my purse!

I keep getting calls from LA Fitness, a friend must've given my details and now every day they ring. I know I need to get in trim and healthy but I feel my purse will get thinnner before me if I have to dish out the monthly charges they expect....

Any hoots i'll hopefully burn a few calories walking the lovely streets of Oxford this weekend, can't wait to get away with Cavy and friends. Will probably put the calories straight back on though when we sample the Tolkien/ Lewis Carol pubs!

50 films we were supposed to have seen by the time we reached a spotty, puberty moody 14!

The 50 films you should see by the age of 14...apparently

Here are the 50 films a panel of experts says children should see by the time they are 14:

THE 10 CHOSEN BY THE BFI

1. Spirited Away (2001) - Animated Japanese film about gods and sorcerers

2. The Wizard of Oz (1939) - Musical classic

3. Les Quatre Cents Coups (1959) - French 12-year-old turns into a hellraiser

4. The Night of the Hunter (1955) - Robert Mitchum as a serial killer in America's Deep South

5. Where is My Friend's House? (1987) - One of Iranian director Kiarostami's earlier works

6. Show Me Love (1998) - Coming-of-age tale of two Swedish girls

7. Toy Story (1995) - Buzz Lightyear and Woody brought to life by computer animation

8. E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial (1982) - Steven Spielberg's sci-fi tearjerker

9. Bicycle Thieves (1948) - Italian film focusing on life after World War II

10. Kes (1969) - Gritty working class British drama

THE REMAINING 40

A Day at the Races (1937) - Marx Brothers comedy

The Adventures of Robin Hood (1938) - Oscar-winning Sherwood Forest action

Au Revoir les Enfants (1987) - World War II drama set in French boarding school

Back to the Future (1985) - Michael J Fox's time-travelling adventure

Beauty and the Beast (1991) - Disney's musical masterpiece

La Belle et la Bete (1946) - French telling of Beauty and the Beast

Billy Elliot (2000) - Working class boy discovers a love of ballet

Edward Scissorhands (1990) - Romantic tale of an uncommonly gentle man

Etre et Avoir (2002) - Portrait of a French school staffed by one teacher

Finding Nemo (2003) - Underwater animation

It's a Wonderful Life (1946) - Frank Capra's uplifting family feature

Jason and the Argonauts (1963) - Greek hero and his adventures

The Kid (1921) - Charlie Chaplin as a tramp

King Kong (1933) - Giant ape thriller

Kirikou et la Sorciere (1998) - Animated African folk tale

Monsieur Hulot's Holiday (1953) - French comedy about a holidaymaker who wreaks havoc

My Life as a Dog (1985) - Swedish boy abused by his family

My Neighbour Totoro (1988) - Japanese animation

Oliver Twist (1948) - Charles Dickens' classic

The Outsiders (1983) - Francis Ford Coppola crime drama

Pather Panchali (1955) - Indian story of survival for a boy in Bengal

Playtime (1967) - Jacques Tati in a French farce

The Princess Bride (1987) - Rob Reiner directed fantastical fairytale

Rabbit-Proof Fence (2002) - Aboriginal epic

Raiders of the Lost Ark (1981) - Harrison Ford goes on a perilous quest

The Railway Children (1970) - Charming drama set in Edwardian England

The Red Balloon (1956) - French parable

Romeo & Juliet (1996) - Baz Luhrmann's modern take on Shakespeare's tragedy

The Secret Garden (1993) - Maggie Smith stars in the classic journey of discovery

Singin' in the Rain (1952) - Gene Kelly musical

Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs(1937) - Classic animated fairytale

Some Like it Hot (1959) - Classic comedy with Marilyn Monroe and Tony Curtis

The Spirit of the Beehive (1973) - Tense drama set in post civil war Spain

Star Wars (1977) - George Lucas's sci-fi epic

To Kill a Mockingbird (1962) - Movie of the Pulitzer winning novel

Le Voyage dans la Lune (1902) - Vintage French space travel

Walkabout (1971) - Children stranded in the Australian outback

Whale Rider (2002) - New Zealand tale of love

Whistle Down the Wind (1961) - Hayley Mills finds Jesus on a farm

The White Balloon (1995) - Iranian tale

I've seen 15 of them but a few of those were after I was 14.

How did you do?

Good ole Kyles

Well Producer really

from the BBC
Web wonder Calvin wins over Kylie
Kylie Minogue is working with the DJ for her new album. An unknown Scottish songwriter has been plucked from obscurity to help write a new album for Kylie Minogue. Calvin Harris from Dumfries was brought to the singer's attention after posting his music on the "My Space" website.
The 23-year-old DJ and former shelf stacker turned to the website where he has built up a cult following.
A spokesman for Kylie said: "She has been working on some tracks with Calvin. Kylie heard stuff he'd done and liked it. Things are going well."
It is understood Mr Harris had been sending demos to record companies for years in the hope of getting noticed.
He had virtually given up on getting a big break when he turned to the web.
His tunes caught the attention of a top producer, who handed his details on to the Australian star.
Mr Harris has signed to Sony BMG and his debut single, Acceptable In The 80s, is being released in March. He is then due to support dance act Faithless on their UK tour.

It seems the net is a great way of being plucked out of the cyber ether and promoted into all forms of popular mass media.

Tosspots Tuesday

As long as it's not tosser or tosspot day!

Happy Shrove pancake tossing day, might try to make some later; batter mix and toss technique permitting!



W O R D S
A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a
day...30,000 to a man's 15,000.
The wife replied, "The reason has to be because we have to repeat
everything to men...
The husband then turned to his wife and asked, "What?"

I think I've posted that one before but what the bleep!

?

Thought of the day

1) Yikes i'm getting older, finally knocking on 31 the timer has just kicked in..I know you mean only just kicked in

Only one thought, well I don't want to over do it


Off to think about making a jack in the box or toy of some sort...

Into the darkness

Saw Notes on a Scandal for a second time last night as my better half fancied seeing it too. The fact that Patrick Marber wrote the screen play and we happen to be rehearsing Marber's play Closer is by the by. Great script and great acting. Judi Dench plays a woman like you've never seen Judi play before, she reminded me of one of the croanies who used to hang out with Francis Bacon in those old smokey back street pubs of London. Cate Blanchett is enchanting and I can see why she was well cast as the character for whom they all seem to fall for. We saw this one after recently seeing quite violent based films which made a pleasant change. The Last King of Scotland was by far the best out of Apocollypto and Blood Diamond. films, films, films... possibly a bit of Hot Fuzz next.....

Will be getting up close but not necessarily personal with props and furniture later for Closer; going under the stage in a hunt for furniture, just hope I don't bump into the Playhouse ghost.

Is it a woman thing?

to start bleaching the mildew that's gathered in the hard to reach places of my flat at 10 o'clock at night.

Some nights I lack the energy to mustre up to doing much more than lifting the remote but others I can be leaping about and getting stuck into things. I remind myself so much of my mum although I haven't started weeding a garden in the dark yet.

Are women a bit odd at times? but that darn mildew was getting on my nerves, it just had to go. Back to more civilised things tonight for I shall be watching another Closer rehearsal and overting my eyes at the saucy bits no doubt.

Crunchy

mmm nothing quite like walking on clean crisp snow. I'm lucky I can walk to work; well I hobbled in like an old lady today to avoid slippage!

I don't think people having to drive to work will appreciate the crunchy stuff quite so much.

Gambler!

Today's the day either the Millenium dome or Blackpool gets it; a mega sized casino.
Unemployment and less people venturing to cheesy Blackpool is their argument for it. Tower Hamletts and Greenwich in London are also suffering from degredation and low levels of employment so those areas near the dome want the casino to pull in the mega bucks to improve neighbouring areas- yeah right- it'll be the casino owners and millionares who'll benefit. I feel if a casino can help people into work great- but it's a shame the capital is having to rely on gambling to improve employment levels. Everything I learnt in Geography at school and forecasted to take place is happening, we in the UK lack in the secondary - manufacturing industries as the work has gone abroad and we have to rely alot on the Tertiary services which i'm ever thankful as both my mum and partner work in these areas so i'd better not grumble, but it's a shame we lack in employment scope to be able to thrive on more interesting challenging areas of work.
So roll your dice, lose your money, get into debt but 2 jags Prescot will be smiling. He's the man who's been in talks to get the casino in motion alongwith an American high roller.
I feel Gunner Midrals- downward spiral of accumulative causation rearing its head and biting us all on the rear...

we do it to ourselves

Hitting a busy spell again with work and play, literally a play being Closer. Tonight all four actors are required to do the first 3 scenes, so far all rehearsals have gone well and the group involved are bonding nicely.
I realised last night just how much I like finding imagery and ripping it up, all in the name of mood sheets;- trying to decipher each character's look. From confident dominant alpha male to stripper come waitress, if you've seen the film you'll know what I mean if not come on over as we're running March 21-24th.

Also on the creative front, am pleased with my mask creation for the work's venetian do this Friday, feeling nervous about the event as i'm becoming more shy these days but i'm sure it'll be fine n dandy. Any excuse to display a bit of glitter and I'm there! The mask would blend in nicely to a Scissor Sisters or Kylie spandangled set.

Brain booster - help!

I'm knarked with myself that all the interesting stuff I learnt at 16 in Biology particulary has fallen down a crevice in my head somewhere. When we're in our early teens we cram so much in our heads in order to pass exams and I decided I needed to do this in order to go into university )(oh and because that's what all my mates were doing- it was the done thing) but then all this juicy information gets forgotten if you don't follow the scientific field or keep your mind ticking over enough and stimuated in things that interest you because work and others things pop up in life.

So I bought the New Scientist- ok not the usual sort of mag I buy but I was fed up with looking at pics of stick thin celebs so after reading some articles a few times some things actually sunk in;- maybe the pretty pictures helped.

Well did you know that even women who are happy in relationships go out of their way to dress up and make the most of themselves to attract others at their most productive stage during their monthly cycle. Eggs a plenty and better get that slap on!

Also people are more often than not attracted to others of very different gene make- ups than to themselves which is a natural way of sustaining variety in the gene pool. So does that explain why a very tall man goes for a petite lady or vice versa. For women we often like the partner to be taller as this apparently shows strength of gene and survival of the fittest, therefore protection and power to procreate plays a key role oh and if he's a dashing soul that helps a bit too :>)

Gazing dating

A new craze to hit New York is to go on gaze dates, instead of chatting you get two minutes to sit in front of a stranger and gaze.

What happens if you get an itch or you just want to laugh out loud..whatever floats your boat, what if you can't focus or your glasses steam up!

Beats naval gazing!

On this day

Kate Middleton-oh you know Prince William's girlfriend is 25
David The Bowster Bowie is 60
Dame Shirley Diva Bassey is 70

I find it hard to believe that boyish Bowie is only 10 years younger than the Queen of Tiger Bay. Kate being a twentysomething just makes me feel old, her beauty scares me, ok i'm jealous of younger beauties and wish I was in decent shape. Should'nt have had that cookie which was so nicely provied by someone's birthday, Don't make cookies look and smell so darn tempting :>)

So what and who cares but sometimes it's nice to know where you are in the getting older stakes.... or is it..

I was glad to read the light and fluffy stuff on the BBC site after reading about the attrocities of the day.

New Year Resolutions- that old yearly chestnut

Dear blog diary,
I've never really said to myself or anyone else each New Year- right my new year resolutions are...

I should I suppose make more time to read more;- to educate and exercise my depleting mind molecules, sleep more and take better care of my health-but that sounds a bit boring.

OK I suppose trying to take up the driving again which I hardly did last year would be useful.

Spend less on frivolous items, oh yeah learn to save the pennies so they magically turn into pounds, or buy more scratch cards and gamble more, what's it to be?

Eat less pringles, eat less pringles, eat less pringles, try to eat less pringles, just don't buy pringles in the first place

Eat more of the green stuff and fruity items, so is that eat more wisely or get on down and dirty with a banana?

Confused
exercise..when? no time, make more time to think about doing exercise

All I do know is that trying to come up with resolutions all sounds terribly depressing and so i'll take myself off to watch a movie, eat pop corn and gulp the fizzy stuff along with the fine wine, puke and regret it all until the next time. Well in reality slope off around the shops and see what's in the sales. Life's a ball.

Just realised that my mind is quite blank, no you don't say as I hear you type if i'm lucky in blogsphere :>)

Find witty things to fill up my blog without nicking bits from others!

Try to observe more, so that requires more people watching, a cafe, carrot cake and a lovely fresh cuppa are essential for this.

So all in all eat more cake and drink more ale.

Wisbo over and out til next year.

ps: What I learned in the last few days of 2006 - drinking red wine, eating lots of cheese and taking 2 paracetomols is not a good idea...

Happy New Year!

Thought i'd better pop by to wish one and all a jolly good time.. hope you're filling up on chocs and wine. mmmmmm and cheese. Did you know more cheese is eaten on Christmas day than any other day in the year...

yawn over you can wake up now!

Well we seemed to watch films of a depressing nature yesterday- not to give plots away but Midnight Cowboy wasn't a jolly roll in the hay as the title assumes, Nicholas Nickleby was a long dreary Dickens with a wooden lead- basically you cared more for the supporting actor. Then Prettyshitybangbang- or something like that- a comedy programme not the old film which I misheard by my close ones saying was a weird mix of fire farting large ladies and miserable gits. What is it with comedy programmes and their liking for larger than any woman in the world characters?

Better go now and watch the Two Ronnies for some light and fluffy entertainment!

Enjoy the break.

Wisbo x

Neverland!

Tired of buying vouchers I thought i'd pop around our local Woolworths to get some small pressies for my friends children. Fortunately i'd been in there before with their mum to get an idea of what the kiddiwinks are into these days. Well it's Bratz for the girls and Pirates of the Caribbean stuff for the boys. I opted for a little pocket pet toy thingy for the girl and a pirates book for the boy. Woolies was stocked with all kinds of Pirates related toys and costumes- so who wants to be a Pirate? The toys look alot more fun these days but for my friends kiddy who is only 6 he already has a computer, TV, cd player, and games stations so I asked what will you get for him when he's 12, she said he'll have probably have left home by then!!!

Don't break a leg!

5 actresses in Newquay, Cornwall in the same show have all got something wrong with their left feet.

One lady was hit by someone falling down a cliff, another a door got her, one cut her foot and I can't remember what the other two did!! How bizarre, they're getting a psychic in to investigate any possible spirits jinxing the theatre.

Didn't catch the name of the show but Mary Hoppins, Hop along Cassidy and My Left foot would be appropriate!

More importantly I wonder what happened to the person falling down the cliff!!!

First Woman Painter to win Turner Prize!

from the BBC site..and a jolly good source indeed

German painter wins Turner Prize

Tomma Abts' reaction
German-born artist Tomma Abts has become the first woman painter to win the £25,000 Turner Prize since it was founded 22 years ago. Abts, who has lived in London for 12 years, beat video artist Phil Collins, poster artist Mark Titchner and sculptor Rebecca Warren.
The judges said the 38-year-old had produced "compelling images that reveal their complexity slowly over time".

Artist Yoko Ono presented the £25,000 prize at London's Tate Britain.

Abts, whose paintings always measure 48 x 38 cm (19 x 15 in), said it was "a real honour" to receive the prize.

Abts begins her paintings with no notion of the end result
"I just started on that size a few years ago and it felt right for what I was doing. Ever since then I've been working in that size and it just feels right," she said.

She said she did not know what she would do with the prize money, adding: "I think it's nice but every artist in the prize deserved to win."
Abts starts work with no idea what she will create and allows the canvas to evolve as she paints.

"It's not that I am only interested in painting, I'm interested in all kinds of art, so I'm not a painter's painter forever," she told the BBC.
"I like any other art. I don't feel I'm representing all the painters here. I'm (just) an artist."
Judges included Tate galleries chairman Sir Nicholas Serota and newspaper writer Lynn Barber.

This year's Turner show included the first "live" exhibit in its history, with Phil Collins setting up an office which houses staff from his TV production company.

Phil Collins' exhibit features a working office of TV researchers. Collins' work also features a film of Turkish people discussing how their lives have been ruined by appearing on reality TV.

Sculptor Rebecca Warren's exhibits include displays of found objects, including bits of fluff, twigs, and a discarded cherry stone. Mark Titchner's entry features a computer-designed billboard with the slogan, "Tiny Masters Of The World Come Out".

Star artists

The Turner Prize, which began in 1984, is given to a British-based artist aged under 50 "for an outstanding exhibition or other presentation of their work".

The prize made a star out of Damien Hirst, who won in 1995, as well as Tracey Emin who was nominated in 1999.

Last year's winner was Simon Starling, who dismantled a shed, made it into a boat, then turned it back into a shed again.

Boats into sheds back to boats, shouldn't that have been beds into sheds and back to beds? Wonder what was more thrilling getting the prize or getting the prize from Yoko? Yoko is known for appearing as an art's object herself. Can a person be an object of art?? mmm I don't think so or can they?

Mind is boggling as normal

Treat your face to a nose job

How would you like to receive a Christmas face lift or nose job token for Christmas. Well that's what some people may find in their stocking this year. How would you feel if a loved one thought it was a nice gesture to give you the chance to improve yourself... I think i'd be most peeved by this, well i'd feel more than peeved... and tell them to take thier lipos and sucks and shove them up somewhere where surgeons have yet to find!

The awful thing is even kiddies are getting into this frame of mind of body enhancements, so when they reach their 30's like moi what will be left to change if they wanted to as their saggings will be on second or third stretch/ drop by then.

I think i'd sooner receive an M&S voucher and get some winter undies than get my lips stretched up to my nose for vanity!!!!!

a friend in need

About to see another friend who has been going through tough times, I try to say the right things or try to make them laugh a bit as a recent 103 year old said her secret was having a laugh and making an effort with her appearance.. well if you can laugh more often than not you're half way there.

Another friend has just come back into my life- she cut herself off since March time with her second really bad time of depression- she's gone back to work having had to or else face losing her job. Her situations haven't changed which triggered her feelings but I hope now she is in a better sate of mind- the drugs help and she says she's on a low dose compared to alot of peolple. Was hard hearing how she contemplated ending it all at times but thoughts of her hubby and irrational almost comical scenarios she thought about stopped her, i'm just glad she's still here to indulge me in wine and laughter because the funny thing is she's always been the one showing a lust for life.

Come on over a little closer

Time again to trot down to the Playhouse and help the DeepEnders bring a play to life. This time I'm Producer or Assistant Director on Closer, my partner 'Culfy' the director has yet to decide what my role is- i'm not fussed on titles just want to be sure that I sort out what's needed to be done...
So off we'll pop with duvet covers, pillows, sheets, scripts and blocking diagrams for some scene creating.

We're having about 6 rehearsals before xmas to get the actors into their parts and 'knowing' eachother in plenty of time for the run next March 2007!

So here's to another show, this time only 4 actors to worry about, no ne we hope will be dissing the director's schedule management and hopefully some interesting acting will develop over the course of the rehearsals. As an observer the last two shows i've helped on the actors haven't been pushed enough, not that i'm the task master type at all! :>)

will keep you posted :>)

WHY MEN'S LETTERS TO "DEAR ABBY" DON'T GET PRINTED

Dear Abby,

I've never written to you before, but I really need your advice on what
could be a crucial decision. I've suspected for some time now that my
wife has been cheating on me.

The usual signs... phone rings but if I answer, the caller hangs up. My
wife has been going out with the girls a lot recently although when I
ask their names she always says, "Just some friends from work, you don't
know them."

I always stay awake to look out for her taxi coming home, but she always
walks down the drive. Although I can hear a car driving off, as if she
has gotten out of the car round the corner. Why? Maybe she wasn't in a
taxi? I once picked her cell phone up just to see what time it was and
she went berserk and screamed that I should never touch her phone again
and why was I checking up on her.

Anyway, I have never approached the subject with my wife. I think deep
down I just didn't want to know the truth, but last night she went out
again and I decided to really check on her.

I decided I was going to park my Harley Davidson motorcycle next to the
garage and then hide behind it so I could get a good view of the whole
street when she came home. It was at that moment, crouching behind my
Harley, that I noticed that the valve covers on my engine seemed to be

Is this something I can fix myself or should I take it back to the
dealer?

Thanks,
Bob

Auditions

Friday night I got to sit on the other side of the fence and watch people audition for Closer.

Was an intersting experience, quite something though to see people nervous , I was surprised how people can come across as confident beings in readings but show nerves in auditions which reflects in their posture and manner ie:- quieter voice and more hunched over, maybe they feel a need to shield themselves more.

Lovvvies!

Last night was the second reading of Closer- the play Culfy will direct next March.

I'm Producing it! Twas interesting to see someone almost pleading for a part when they've yet to audition. I'll be on the panel Friday watching auditions and forming my own opinins- I'll try not to be a Simon Cowell- I'll be more Mona Lisa I think :>)

Oh to be British

Ok these have done the rounds but here they are again :>)


Being British is about driving in a German car to an Irish pub for a
Belgian beer, then travelling home, grabbing an Indian curry or a
Turkish kebab on the way, to sit on Swedish furniture and watch American
shows on a Japanese TV.

And the most British thing of all? Suspicion of anything foreign. Oh
and...... Only in Britain... can a pizza get to your house faster than
an ambulance.


Only in Britain... do supermarkets make sick people walk all the way to
the back of the shop to get their prescriptions while healthy people can
buy cigarettes at the front.

Only in Britain... do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries and
a DIET coke.

Only in Britain... do banks leave both doors open and chain the pens to
the counters.

Only in Britain... do we leave cars worth thousands of pounds on the
drive and lock our junk and cheap lawn mower in the garage.

Only in Britain... do we use answering machines to screen calls and then
have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to
talk to in the first place.

Only in Britain... are there disabled parking places in front of a
skating rink.

NOT TO MENTION...


3 Brits die each year testing if a 9v battery works on their tongue.

142 Brits were injured in 1999 by not removing all pins from new shirts.

58 Brits are injured each year by using sharp knives instead of
screwdrivers.

31 Brits have died since 1996 by watering their Christmas tree while the
fairy lights were plugged in.

19 Brits have died in the last 3 years believing that Christmas
decorations were chocolate.


British Hospitals reported 4 broken arms last year after cracker pulling
accidents.


101 people since 1999 have had broken parts of plastic toys pulled out
of the soles of their feet.

18 Brits had serious burns in 2000 trying on a new jumper with a lit
cigarette in their mouth.


A massive 543 Brits were admitted to A&E in the last two years after
opening bottles of beer with their teeth.

5 Brits were injured last year in accidents involving out of Control
Scalextric cars.

and finally.........


In 2000 eight Brits cracked their skull whilst throwing up into the
toilet.

How silly are some people- lit fag and jumper scenario!! I've done the beer one when I was student without a cork screw and we were outside:>)

All that glitters!

is gold! or pinky/ silvery atleast

Well that's another show down!..I was busy scene changing for Comic Potential last week and at the weekend. I didn't manage to pull too many muscles whilst lugging off chests of drawers and beds! The actors managed to bring the show to it's futuristically intended life on a minimalist set which I helped to construct. The leading lady recovered from nerves and fever in time for opening night and gave a star spangled performance, spinning around the stage amongst a fully supporting cast who managed to get by on only a few prompts- well not too many. The Culfy gave his Marmion character an endearing Beatlesque/ Fry & Laurie -Control/ some strange spiked haired guy who may have come from Lost in Space and been catapulted into 2006 pretending to be 50 years ahead of his time- well that's over and now onto Closer. Culfy is directing this next March- so its onwards and sideways with readings and auditions this week...no rest for Deep Enders....

Inanimate Gender

Have you ever stopped to think whether the inanimate things around us also have genders? Believe it or not, they do! Check out these things we use in our daily lives, who would have though!?!

Ziploc bags are male, because they hold everything in, but you can see right through them.
Copiers are female, because once turned off; it takes a while to warm them up again. It's an effective reproductive device if the right buttons Are pushed, but can wreak havoc if the wrong buttons are pushed.
A tire is male, because it goes bald and it's often over-inflated.
A hot air balloon is male, because, to get it to go anywhere, you have to light a fire under it, and of course, there's the hot air part.
Sponges are female, because they're soft, squeezable and retain water.
A web page is female, because it's always getting hit on.
A subway is male, because it uses the same old lines to pick people up.
An hourglass is female, because over time, the weight shifts to the bottom.
A hammer is male, because it hasn't changed much over the last 5,000 years, but it's handy to have around.
A remote control is female. Ha! You thought it'd be male, didn't you? But consider this - it gives a man pleasure and he'd be lost without it


Remote one is so true!

Remedies and side effects

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WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when clearly you are not.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you can sing.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at four in the morning.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically converse with members of the opposite sex without spitting.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause pregnancy.


I'm more worried about the health damages but hey we have to live life don't we, just not supoosed to over indulge too much in life's niceties...as we head towards Christmas, over indulgence can't be helped...

A woman on the verge

Probably blogged this one before but who gives a fig leaf :>)

I'm not a Delia are you?

Are you a Delia or are you a Real Party Girl?


Delia's Way
Stuff a miniature marshmallow in the bottom of a sugar cone to prevent ice-cream drips.

The Real Woman's Way
Just suck the ice cream out of the bottom of the cone, for God's sake. You are probably lying on the couch with your feet up eating it anyway.

Delia's Way
To keep potatoes from budding, place an apple in the bag with the potatoes.

The Real Woman's Way
Buy Smash and keep it in the cupboard for up to a year.


Delia's Way
When a cake recipe calls for flouring the baking tin, use a bit of the dry cake mix instead and there won't be any white mess on the outside of the cake.

The Real Woman's Way
Tescos' sell cakes. They even do decorated versions.

Delia's Way
If you accidentally over-salt a dish while it's still cooking, drop in a potato slice.

The Real Woman's Way
If you over salt a dish while you are cooking, that's tough sh!t. Please recite with me the Real Woman's motto: "I made it and you will eat it and I don't care how bad it tastes."

Delia's Way
Wrap celery in aluminum foil when putting in the refrigerator and it will keep for weeks

The Real Woman's Way
It could keep forever.Who eats it?

Delia's Way
Cure for headaches: Take a lime, cut it in half and rub it on your forehead. The throbbing will go away.

The Real Woman's Way
Cure for headaches: Take a lime, cut it in half and drop it in 8 ounces of vodka. Drink the vodka. You might still have the headache, but you wont give a sh*t?

Delia's Way
If you have a problem opening jars, try using latex dishwashing gloves. They give a non-slip grip that makes opening jars easy.

The Real Woman's Way
Why do I have a man?


Finally the most important tip!


Delia's Way
Freeze left over wine into ice cubes for future use in casseroles

The Real Woman's Way
Left over wine????Helllloooo !!

Men

Silly things apparently about men are doing the rounds again..
Men Are Just Happier People -- What do you expect from such simple lifestyles?

*Your last name stays put.
*The garage is all yours.
*Wedding plans take care of themselves.
*Chocolate is just another snack.
*You can be President.
*You can never be pregnant.
*You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.
*You can wear NO shirt to a water park.
*Car mechanics tell you the truth.
*The world is your urinal.
*You never have to drive to another gas station rest-room because this one is just too icky.
*Same work, more pay.
*Wrinkles add character.
*Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental-$100.
*People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
*The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.
*New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
*One mood all the time.
*Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.

*A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
*You can open all your own jars.
*You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
*Your underwear is $8.95 for a 12-pack.
*Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
*You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
*Everything on your face stays its original color.
*The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
*You only have to shave your face and neck.
*You can play with toys all your life.
*Your belly usually hides your big hips.
*One wallet and one pair of shoes one color for all seasons.
*You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
*You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife.
*You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache..
*You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.
*One mood all the time.
*Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.

*A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
*You can open all your own jars.
*You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
*Your underwear is $8.95 for a 12-pack.
*Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
*You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
*Everything on your face stays its original color.
*The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
*You only have to shave your face and neck.
*You can play with toys all your life.
*Your belly usually hides your big hips.
*One wallet and one pair of shoes one color for all seasons.
*You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
*You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife.
*You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache..
*You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.

Women none of the above! but not sure about the face and the original colour- don't get that!!!

- and maybe bellies hide women's hips too!

- and I know someone who can survive on 2 pairs of shoes..

- so as usual all a load of ballericks apart from the last one!!!! and the muzzy

and I'm really not sure about the shorts one either!!!

"The only thing that is real about me is my heart"

Dolly Parton

heard that ths morning, bless her she really is a doll and she knows it!

made me chuckle anyway...she has so many coats of many colours!!!

I haven't anything fake about me.....yet

Not really one for lip-os, sucks n tucks and all kinds of enhancement jobs!!!!

Rainbow sheep!

Whilst learning how to handle a fire extinguisher today and blasting a carpark tarmac with water and C02 more importanly I gleaned from my colleagues that...

Baa baa rainbow sheep have you any wool, yes (person of a certain gender, yes person of a certain gender) 3 bags full is the new nursey rhyme children must adhere to.

Children aren't allowed to sing about Baa baa Black sheep or gingerbread men- now we must say gingerbread people. Please can I have a gingerbread person to take-away!

Also noddy and big ears aren't allowed to share a bed and all the scenes of Tom & Jerry where they are smoking have been cut...I can't remember them smoking.. but it's ok for them to hit one another on the head with frying pan!!!..anyway the fire fighter said he certainly didn't take up smoking when he was a youth because he'd watched a cartoon... but I was always nifty with a pan!!

I think if we survived Rainbow the TV show we'll be alright :>)

Seems Political Correctness is the vogue of the day.

What will be next?

Love is still in the air

Such a boost for the soul to see two newlyweds together, one was a 94 year old guy and the lady was in her 70's. My favourite morning show GMTV (well that's the kind of thing I watch to cheer me up before work) had them on live from their living room. Just nice to see some happy folk, kissing and canoodling in the morning. The lady had put an ad in the lonely hearts column of her local rag after feeling down after losing her husband and she had 49 responses! Go lady, Go!! The guy to win her over lied about his age when they met, said he was a mere 82 rather than 94. Well he looked a dapper 70 something if a day and in his earlier years was a model...so anyway just thought I'd share a piece of sweetness on this Friday.

Have a good weekend one and all.

more silly giggles to be had

Wanda's dishwasher quit working so she called a repairman. Since she had to go to work the next day, she told the repairman, "I'll leave the key under the mat. Fix the dishwasher, leave the bill on the counter, and I'll mail you a cheque."

"Oh, by the way don't worry about my bulldog Spike. He won't bother you. But, whatever you do, do NOT, under ANY circumstances, talk to my parrot! I REPEAT, DO NOT TALK TO MY PARROT!!!"

When the repairman arrived at Wanda's apartment the following day, he discovered the biggest, meanest looking bulldog he had ever seen. But, just as she had said, the dog just lay there on the carpet watching the repairman go about his work.

The parrot, however, drove him nuts the whole time with his incessant yelling, cursing and name-calling.

Finally the repairman couldn't contain himself any longer and yelled, "Shut up, you stupid, ugly bird!"

To which the parrot replied, "Get him, Spike!"

See, men just don't listen!

30 and past it...never!

This is for all girls 30 years and above.... and for those who are

turning 30, and for those who are scared of moving into their
30's...AND
for guys who are scared of girls over 30!!!!...This was written by
Andy
Rooney from CBS 60 Minutes.



Andy Rooney says:

As I grow in age, I value women who are over 30 most of all. Here are

just a few reasons why:



A woman over 30 will never wake you in the middle of the night to
ask,
"What are you thinking?" She doesn't care what you think.



If a woman over 30 doesn't want to watch the game, she doesn't sit

around whining about it. She does something she wants to do. And,
it's
usually something more interesting.



A woman over 30 knows herself well enough to be assured in who she is

what she is, what she wants and from whom. Few women past the age of
30
give a hoot what you might think about her or what she's doing.



Women over 30 are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with
you
at the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant. Of course,
if
you deserve it, they won't hesitate to shoot you, if they think they
can
get away with it.



Older women are generous with praise, often undeserved. They know
what
it's like to be unappreciated.



A woman over 30 has the self-assurance to introduce you to her women

friends. A younger woman with a man will often ignore even her best

friend because she doesn't trust the guy with other women. Women over
30
couldn't care less if you're attracted to her friends because she
knows
her friends won't betray her.



Women get psychic as they age. You never have to confess your sins to
a
woman over 30. They always know. A woman over 30 looks good wearing

bright red lipstick. This is not true of younger women.



Once you get past a wrinkle or two, a woman over 30 is far sexier
than
her younger counterpart. Older women are forthright and honest.
They'll
tell you right off if you are a jerk if you are acting like one! You

don't ever have to wonder where you stand with her.



Yes, we praise women over 30 for a multitude of reasons.
Unfortunately,
it's not reciprocal. For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed hot
woman
of 30+, there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool
of
himself with some 22-year-old waitress.



Ladies, I apologise.



For all those men who say, "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk

for free". Here's an update for you. Nowadays 80% of women are
against
marriage, why? Because women realise it's not worth buying an entire

pig, just to get a little sausage.

Mid wife crisis

Watching breakfast tv today yet again the subject was the lack of midwives working in the UK when there are many women qualifying in midwifery but have no jobs to go to. Lack of NHS funds- same old story. Having heard from friends their experiences of giving birth and the care needed it seems the lack of midwives and available care is a scary prospect if the situation worsens into the future. I know it may sound selfish but i'd certainly want the care if I'm ever in that situation.. wouldn't fancy fending for myself!!...from what I've heard.

The MP who was questioned on this (alas I don't her name) could only say the success rate is at an all time high for no problem pregnancies and births. Alas she couldn't give a positive solution to the lack of mid wife positions in this country. Also she remarked how more and more women are choosing to have children later on and how more are choosing to have C- sections...so that's ok then????

I just think its a sad state to be in in this country where qualified people are desperate to have temporary, part time work and job shares just to get the practice in and to have a job in the area they've trained in...tis also a shame as midwifery may have appealed to me but job prospects look bleak so I might as well not even contemplate it.

Even my dad is about to face the job search scenario all over again.....he's not a midwife in case you wondered!

Roll on Monday when Cavy and I head off to God's Own Country- so I'm told- to the green wilds of Dunfanaghy in North West Ireland.

Farewell and top of the mornin' to ya

I don't feel like dancin' but I do feel like putting out fires

Next week I get the chance to do some long awaited fire training for work! Can't wait to have a go at extinguishing a few flames.... wonder if we get to don the uniforms too! My friend has a thing about fire engines nevermind the men..funny fetishes some people have :>)

well I don't feel like dancin' ...just love the new Scissor Sisters album and how they like to kiss You Off!

First night

Happy to say all went well and the spark came back- it's amazing what an audience and some adrenalin can do to the actors. The officers were more scary, Sideways- that's my Culfy wsa ever more Sideways- just brimming!

I didn't have to prompt either as the arctors remembered everything- so my mind did wander slightly at times but hopefully I'll keep awake tonight! :>)

Only 3 shows to go.

perhaps I need a can of red ball and pro plus?!!

bunch of theatrical tarts!

Well tonight's the first night of a very short run of Our Country's Good- we did this play back in July when we were almost washed away in the rain- good character building stuff.

Now back in the cosy theatre we have the chance to re-visit this play and give it some extra spark, alas I don't think we'll quite manage it but who knows the actors may pull something extra out of the convicts sack.

Basically the director has been too nice and not really pulled the best from his actors, whilst the actros complain behind his back. I can see what's going on as i've sat through the show may times having the duty to do of prompting... oh well let's hope the actors don't fluff thier lines but if they do then i've something to do! :>)

here's too tantrums and tiaras, bless their little white legs!

and freeze!

your eggs, if you're about 30, living your life exactly as Brigitte Jones and hope to have children a little later on in life- then that's what women need to do.

Well when I heard in the news this week that scientists were encouraging young women to freeze their eggs so they would have more chance of having children at a later date- well hopefully sometime in the future... before they are too old and don't have too many grey hairs and they are hitting a more granny age than motherhood, I was again put to worrying about the egg timer body clock which hangs over women from when they reach 20 or even younger it seems in our time.....

I mentioned this to Culfy and he ranted too that women get a hard enough time so why keep on to them about these issues all of the time, here, here I said.... he also remarked that young women in the States were being urged not to smoke, drink, eat the wrong things in case this affects fertility- so can't young women live life and have fun while they can...after all if you can't have fun when you're young free and dabbling in what life has to offer when can you????

I suppose being aware of my own body clock and the big freeze prospects has been highlighted by my three friends who have given birth in the last two weeks-one only yesterday. I dedicate this blog to wishing them all the very best and look forward to being a part of their little uns lives and watching them grow. It was such a good feeling to see our friend enjoy his new father status last night and join him in his celebration....it's certainly a time to pop some corks!!!

Black out

I made a small cheer amongst my office as I walked back into work after lunch and the lights went out- it was thundering outside and I thought wehey- we can go home early if the electricity is off- alas it gradually came back.

I seemed to be the only one in a Friday feeling mood and saw the possiblity of going home early- ah well I just think i'm working with androids sometimes...

have a good weekend all

Sweet 16

and the time I was at my Saturday job's christmas works do and I forgot I'd tucked my flouncy very light weight skirt into my knickers and tights- nice look! came out of the loos and it was a bloke in his 60's who had the pleasure of telling me about my skirt issue :>)

that was also the do where I felt sick due to the salmon starter and probably the under age alco pops consumptions.

Just thought I'd share a few meaningless moments of my time so far...

the sort of things you read in women's mags that are the do nots and never dos on a night out.

the need for eyes in the back of my head

Only this morning whilst picking up my trousers for work did I see a chocolate clump of a stain!

I think I must've sat on cake in Costa's coffee shop- oopps- well I hope I hadn't sat in it at work and no one had told me all day.

Life's little woopsies!!!

Wear your sparklies to work day

Today at work a touch of glamour took us a minute or two away from the usual work drudge- a woman parraded her sparkly quartz encrusted high heeled slingbacks around the office in the name of 'breaking them in'. Asked why by one girl- she said "I'm getting them ready for a wedding", well tis up to her but at work my footsies need comfyness and I can't imagine teetering about the photocopier while hoping not to fall over all in name of wedding prep- or maybe I was just jealous- one Dutch woman with a renowned booming voice was not impressed and asked- is the wedding today- but a nice touch came from a 6ft and the rest guy who asked if he could get them in a size 12.

I've heard rumours that the woman in question has spent £300 on shoes before- well if you've got the money you might as well flaunt and enjoy it- either she has a rich partner or i'm definately in the wrong job at work!! :>)

Like bees to a honey pot

Like flies to a cow pat, well that's how I and other girls were in the office today when one woman had bought some shiny jewellry items- I'm just a sucker for anything like that and when I asked was it pricey in the shop- the woman replied- I don't look at prices.

Well that shut me up- alright for soome eh :>)

Will you be getting your.........

(INDICATION OF THE upper female regions) out in public to breast feed? well not quite those words but you can guess ;>)

A true question I heard today asked by one friend (father to be) to another who is expecting! It was the funniest thing i'd heard today amongst a select gathering- we were out for lunch with a girl friend who is leaving work this week in order to put feet up and get much needed rest before expectant bb arrives.

Made me laugh anyway

Good luck and all the best to my expecting friends- may the heat subside and your little bundles arrive with minimal efforts..

It's the Hottest Day of the Year

So in the heat of the moment I thought i'd drop a few funnies your way :>)


> CREATION
>A man said to his wife one day, "I don't know how you can be so stupid
>and so beautiful all at the same time."The wife responded, "Allow me to
>explain. God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me; God made
>me stupid so I would be attracted to you!
>
>
>WHO DOES WHAT
>A man and his wife were having an argument about who should brew the
>coffee each morning. The wife said, "You should do it, because you get
>up first, and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee."
>The husband said, "You are in charge of cooking around here and you
>should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my
>coffee." Wife replies, "No, you should do it, and besides, it is in the
>Bible that the man should do the coffee." Husband replies, "I can't
>believe that, show me." So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New
>Testament and showed him at the top of several pages, that it indeed
>says.......... "HEBREWS"

It's too hot for tights!

well especially for men to wear tights!!!!!

Well that's what my other half Cavy will be doing this weekend- sorry this is not a moment of me unleashing our more saucier sides- alas I hear you not cry!! (well he does know his 40 denieres from his kneee highs but that's between you, me and the blogsphere gatepost :>)

The show is on this Saturday and Cavy and co will be strutting their theatrical legs and voices in Our Country's Good.

Rehearsals are hotting up- well the temperatures are rising in the rehearsal rooms but the acting in some parts doesn't seem to be reaching it's pinnacle, hopefully they'll pull something extra out of the bag on the night!! (perhaps they're too hot- bless em) I'm making it sound worse than it is, just that when prompting I follow the script and actor's to the letter every night and I suppose i've seen it countless times. I'm enjoying it - I can just see where the director could've improved it- but tis not my place to say. Even if i'm moaning here, I mustn't grumble;- with every show you always feel a bit peeved at things before the show.. best bits this week so far was being in a room surrounded by men in tights!!! yes the sights i've seen.

Roll on Saturday eve - with the show being out doors it should be a lovely evening in beautiful surroundings- hope it doesn't rain....

Hi I'm Elmo who are you?

Everyone has a personality of a cartoon character.
Have you ever asked yourself what cartoon character you most resemble?

A group of investigators got together and analyzed the personalities of
well known and modern cartoon characters. The information that was
gathered was made into this test.

Answer all the questions with what describes you best, add up all your
Points (which are next to the answer that you choose) at the end and
look for your results.

Do not cheat by looking at the end of the e-mail before you are done .
Then forward this to all your friends (including the person who sent it
to you) and change the subject of this message to what character is
you.

1. Which one of the following describes the perfect date?
a) Candlelight dinner (4 pts.)
b) Fun/Theme Park (2 pts.)
c) Painting in the park (5 pts.)
d) Rock concert (1 pt.)
e) Going to the movies (3 pts.)

2. What is your favorite type of music?
a) Rock and Roll (2 pts.)
b) Alternative (1 pt.)
c) Soft Rock (4 pts.)
d) Country (5 pts.)
e) Pop (3 pts.)

3. What type of movies do you prefer?
a) Comedy (2 pts.)
b) Horror (1 pt.)
c) Musical (3 pts.)
d) Romance (4 pts.)
e) Documentary (5 pts.)

4. Which one of these occupations would you choose if you only could
choose one of these?
a) Waiter (4 pts.)
b) Professional Sports Player (5 pts.)
c) Teacher (3 pts.)
d) Police (2 pts.)
e) Cashier (1 pt)

5 . What do you do with your spare time?
a) Exercise (5 pts.)
b) Read (4 pts.)c) Watch television (2 pts.)
d) Listen to music (1 pt.)
e) Sleep (3 pts.)

6. Which one of the following colors do you like best?
a) Yellow (1 pt.)
b) White (5 pts.)
c) Sky Blue (3 pts.)
d) Dark Blue (2 pts.)
e) Red (4 pts.)

7. What do you prefer to eat?
a) Snow (3 pts.)
b) Pizza (2 pts.)
c) Sushi (1 pt.)
d) Pasta (4 pts.)
e) Salad (5 pts.)

8. What is your favorite holiday?
a) Halloween (1 pt.)
b) Christmas (3 pts.)
c) New Year (2 pts.)
d) Valentine's Day (4 pts.)
e) Thanksgiving (5 pts.)

9. If you could go to one of these places which one would it be?
a) Paris (4 pts)
b) Spain (5 pts)
c) Las Vegas (1 pt)
d) Hawaii (4 pts)
e) Hollywood (3 pts)

10. With which of the following would you prefer to spend time with?
a) Someone Smart (5 pts.)
b) Someone attractive (2 pts.)
c) Someone who likes to Party (1 pt.! )
d) Someone who always has fun (3 pts.)
e) Someone very sentimental (4 pts.)

Now add up your points and find out the answer you have been waiting
for!

Put your character in the subject line and forward to your friends and
back to the person that sent this to you.

(10-16 points) You are Garfield:
You are very comfortable, easy going, and you definitely know how to
have fun but sometimes you take it to an extreme. You always know what
you are doing and you are always in control of your life. Others may not
see things as you do, but that doesn't mean that you always have to do
what is right. Try to remember, your happy spirit may hurt yo! u or
others.

(17-23 points) You are Snoopy:
You are fun, you are very cool and popular. You always know what's in
and you are never are out of style. You are good at knowing how to
satisfy everyone else. You have probably disappeared for a few days
more than once but you always come home with the family values that you
learned. Being married and having children are important to you, but
only after you have had your share of fun times.

(24-28 points) You are Elmo:
You have lots of friends and you are also popular, always willing to
give advice and help out a person in need. You are very optimistic and
you always see the bright side of things. Some good advice: try not to
be too much of a dreamer. Dreaming too big could cause many conflicts in
your life.

(29-35 points) You are Sponge Bob Square Pants:
You are the classic person that everyone loves. You are the best friend
that ! anyone could ever have and never wants to lose. You never cause
harm to anyone and they would never not understand your feelings. Life
is a journey, it's funny and calm for the most part. Stay away from
traitors and jealous people, and you will be stress free.

(36-43 points) You are Charlie Brown:
You are tender, you fall in love quickly but you are also very serious
about all relationships. You are a family person. You call your Mom
every Sunday. You have many friends and may occasionally forget a few
Birthdays. Don't let your passion confuse you with reality.

(44-50 points) You are Dexter:
You are smart and definitely a thinker... Every situation is fronted
with a plan. You have a brilliant mind. You demonstrate very strong
family principles. You maintain a stable routine but never ignore a bad
situation when it comes. Try to do less over thinking every once in a
while to spic! e things up a bit with spontaneity!

I'm a deamer, so true :>)

Happenings around town

Saw a huge billowing black smoke-ball earlier, apparently workmen were tarring a roof in our shopping centre and it went up like a bomb, first concerns from people I heard were- that's not my house is it- I too thought the very same as I live in its general direction. Hopefully no one was hurt , yet to find out more in the local rag.
More happenings, I've been having a homeless guy shelter in the flats where I live. Seems that I'm the only one in the block to be quite concerned for my safety and the homeless guys well being.

The Police are on the case and it was a comical moment last night when 2 lady officers turned up at mine and I was slightly tipsey. Up to this point I've probably sounded quite serious on the phone regarding the situation and then they show up when I'm not on my best.

aaahhhhhhh wwwweeelll ooffiicer.. dibble

The Sound of Silence

We had a two minute silence at work for the July 7 London Bombing victims today. A tanoy announcement went out but some people didn't hear it or were on the phone so the silence was broken by typing clatter, chat and obliviousness.

I discussed this with a friend as we vented a quick rant about the lack of respect shown but we felt a definate move to a certain place so people would be made more aware and had the choice to take part in a united silence would be better than sitting at desks.

rant over

hope for peace
xx

Tantrums and tiara's

Hooray the heavens have opened but alas flooding is not good.

By the by last night's hot n stickyness didn't help the actors I was promptng for. The show- Our Country's Good-(aka alright) has only two weeks to go before the show.

Observer me got to witness tantrums and tiaras for one actor through a well justified strop for he'd acted everyone else's part for those who didn't turn up and never got to do his bit. Unfortunately his strop on fuelled the director's anger and he threw a wobbly- and doesn't know why he bothers so. I escaped the roth and left quickly....A typical night at the Playhouse. Every show i've helped on there's always a low patch everyone goes through.

Here's to tantrums and tiara's! Hopefully I won't drop a hissy fit.

It's getting hot in here!

Balmy it certainly is as balmy does.
I'm not a sun worshipper but I love to see bright skys and walk in the sun but I can't cope too well with hot 'n' sticky humid days and nights. That's what we've got today.
Yesterday evening we were invited for a picnic on top of Cleeve Hill- it was lovely just relaxing overlooking the vista of Nham with others until the thunder rumbled directly overhead. It's England we're used to stickling it out as long as we can, hoping the rain won't stop play and us eating our cheese and onion sarnies; but in the end we had to dive for cover when the rain drops were hard and splattery and the risk of lightening striking was imminent. Our friends wonderfully air- conditioned car oooh we could've stayed the night in there instead!